It's chaos, but it is actually a chaos that I embrace because it keeps me distracted. Mother's Day is complicated for me. The days leading up to and after it aren't really much better, and these days in the middle of May are ones where I'd wander around a little bit lost if I didn't have a million things to do. Her birthday is the 29th, the same day as my oldest son. Was the 29th.
Semantics are such an asshole sometimes.
Anyhow, I welcome the overbooked schedules this time of year. Distraction is highly underrated in this society.
I digress. We're here to scream and throw stuff, so let's do that.
Speaking of Mother's Day....
Raise your hand if you are a mom and you had an hour's worth of dishes to do and an entire kitchen to clean up the day after Mother's Day.
The downside to "taking the day off" is that it just means twice the amount of work the next day. #truth
I wasn't actually online much this weekend, which isn't actually accidental. I take the requests for the music marathon and schedule them, then walk away from it all for the day. I do it for my own reasons, but it has the added bonus effect of insulating me from all the people arguing online. Yesterday, though, I saw some of it. The arguments that get dragged out into the light every year between Mother's Day and Father's Day. The open letters. You've seen them, I'm sure.
- it's all manufactured to sell greeting cards and jewelry (it totally is)
- it's horribly painful for people with complicated relationships with their moms/kids or for people who've dealt with infertility, etc. (it totally is)
- it's the biggest humblebrag day on the internet where the women who get expensive things and spa days then post a million pictures that are all hashtagged #blessed (it totally is)
- it's not fair to the single dads/single moms/dog moms/insert any group who feels marginalized here (if the shoe fits, by all means wear it...)
I'm sure I'm missing a few, but you get the point. Everyone has to argue about everything anymore and it's exhausting.
My current favorite argument is the one about how dads are held up on pedestals for doing totally ordinary parenting things and moms are nitpicked for every excruciating detail of what they do. Yay. Internet. (this one is totally true too, btw)
What would be awesome is if people could just do whatever they need to do on that day. If you have a great Mother's Day, awesome. If you want to crawl into a hole and avoid everything for the weekend, that's fine too. No good ever comes from comparing ourselves to anyone else. Life is not a competition for either the best or the worst or the most #blessed or the hardest. There aren't gold stars being handed out here, folks. People get to feel however they feel. What's not cool is trying to make other people feel like shit because your life situation is different than someone else's.
Now get off my lawn.
Prince didn't die because of pain meds. I repeat, Prince did not die because of pills.
God I hate the media sometimes. They've become so adept at generating sensationalism and so horrifically bad at accurate reporting that I'm starting to think they all need their press passes pulled permanently. For real.
The dialogue surrounding Prince's death shifted dramatically when news started coming out about the fact that he was taking pain medication, that he was scheduled to meet with a doctor about the issue, that there are investigations now into where he obtained the meds and so on and so forth.
So, in the eyes of the media and PLENTY of people out there now, he's just another druggie who wasted his life because of his selfishness.
Do not do this, people. You're better than this.
It's well known that he suffered from some pretty significant pain for a very long time. He had serious issues with his hips, and if anyone out there has ever had problems with their hips, you already know that that pain travels up and down your body. It affects everything about your legs and back and neck. All of it.
Though I don't have personal information about his conditions or what he did or didn't do to try and treat the pain, I can guess. I can guess because it's a pretty typical path that people walk all the time, and not just the famous musicians.
- Something is wrong with their body physically.
- It can't be fixed easily or completely or the cause isn't discovered or treated.
- Medication is tossed at the pain, an effective, but short term bandaid, but one that does nothing to treat the cause of the pain itself.
- Pain meds become less effective over time, patient needs more to achieve pain control.
- Vicious cycle begins of trying different meds or doses just to deal with pain.
- Underlying issue still never dealt with.
- Patient becomes "addicted" (I hate that word)
Deaths from overdose in these situations often occur when someone tries to quit taking the meds and goes back on them, or when they change from one med to another. Those meds might work a tiny bit differently, or the doses might be too high, or they might be taken in combination with other meds for anxiety or muscle relaxation or whatever, which can be a fatal mix. When the person dies, fingers start getting pointed, people chalk it up to drug abuse.
No one talks about why.
No one gets ugly with the reason people end up in this situation.
No one wants to admit that we're terrible at treating pain in this society, that we often don't even try to remedy the cause of it in the first place.
It's easier to point a finger, climb up on that soapbox and condemn the dead, blame them for their fate.
It's easier, sure.
It's just wrong.
The West Point "controversy"
A group of black female West Point graduating cadets posed for a picture. In one of the shots, they each raised a fist. One blogger took this personally, said it was a political gesture tied to the #blacklivesmatter movement, and there's now an investigation into the situation.
This "controversy" all started because one white blogger pushed his agenda, claiming that the women in the picture were tied to a movement he doesn't even seem to understand.
This shouldn't be an issue.
A fist in the air isn't new, isn't novel, isn't irretrievably tied to the BLM movement, and isn't inherently political in nature. It's a symbol of strength, of pride, of solidarity, of unity, of completing a task. Maybe it's something that this white blogger doesn't understand, but that's not the fault of the women in the picture.
If you see something else when you look at that picture, then you need to take a step back and realize that your perception is what is tainting it, not their actions.
It's just a picture.
When the GOP went boom
The presumptive nomination of Trump has heads spinning all over the world, with most people outside our shores wondering what the hell is happening here. I'm wondering that myself pretty frequently.
What occurred yesterday left me speechless though, made my face do that thing where it scrunches up all weird and stays that way because I'm trying to figure out what just happened.
Paul Ryan, Speaker of the House, said that he'd step away from chairing the convention if Trump asks him to. Even though he won't support him.
The sitting GOP leader with the most authority in this nation is willing to just step aside at the will of a presumptive nominee that he can't even personally support?
The same dude totally unwilling to even entertain the SCOTUS nominee put forth by the actual sitting and elected president?
He'll get out of the way for Trump???
What is happening?
I honestly think we're seeing the beginning of the end for the GOP as we know it, a splintering of the party.
All I know is that I don't want Trump anywhere near missile launch codes.
Loretta Lynch, superstar
While it would have been possible for the Governor in North Carolina to veto the bathroom bill, he didn't. He issued some executive orders after it passed, mostly in response to the backlash against both him and the state, trying to rectify some of the very wrongs he legalized. It wasn't enough.
Loretta Lynch isn't having it.
She's filing a federal civil rights lawsuit, and she just did it in the most refreshing way.
All the claps.