Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Fantasy Island - the 2014 reboot

I'll be the first to blame my out of whack hormones for this post (which will likely become a series of posts just like it did last time because I don't have just one island....noooooo....I have an archipelago).

If you aren't familiar with the fantasy island game, it goes a little bit like this. One deserted island, you and the people you'd pick to be stranded with given the option. You aren't supposed to pick your spouse or significant other, you aren't supposed to pick friends or family or anyone you know in real life. This is a purely hypothetical fantasy journey we're on, so just enjoy it for the fun it is and don't overthink it.

Now, the traditional rules of the game are that you get 5 people per island. I say per island because there is supposed to just be one island, but like I said before, I prefer an archipelago...meaning I have a male island, a female island, a geek island and several other islands. I even have an island where I'd like to send people to be banished forever.

In this version, I reserve the right to increase the size of the island. Because rules schmules. And this is a fantasy, dammit. So there.

If you missed the first incarnations of these posts, you can read them by using the following links.

The 2012 Male Island

The 2012 Female Island

All other islands in the archipelago

Up first will be my male island. I've discovered quite a few new additions to the list in the last couple of years, so get comfortable and enjoy. Consequently, I've had to bump a few off the island. Tear.

1. Tom Hiddleston.

I get a little obnoxious fangirl about him, so I apologize in advance. Sort of.

Look at this.

Also known as Loki in the nerdiverse, he is something magical to behold. Those eyes. The naughty smile. It's just not right that one guy can be this good looking. He's funny, he's a total goofball, and there is an entire website devoted to parts of him. If you are interested in checking it out, just know that I'm warning you before you go. Give yourself a few hours to scroll and time to take a cold shower afterwards.

Plus, this scene was in Thor 2 (and honestly, he's so much hotter than Thor...). I may have squealed in the theater. Hot damn.

There is also this. Everyone should watch this.

2. Norman Reedus.

If the zombie apocalypse ever happens, he's coming with me. For serious.

I was late to The Walking Dead party, but I showed up okay, and that's all that matters. I may have binge watched entire seasons at a time to catch up, but so be it. Daryl is worth it, dammit.

My phone case has the wings from his vest on it. I got a tiny Daryl for Christmas that sits on the windowsill in my kitchen. I'm not actually kidding about either thing. I ugly cried when he ugly cried in the show when his good for nothing older brother finally died. Who doesn't love a good ugly cry???

The more I get to know about him, the more I like him. He's hilarious, he's a photographer, he's a former model who never took himself all that seriously. His face was reconstructed after an accident, and he passed up the chance to have it completely fixed. One of his eye sockets is made of titanium. True story.

His instagram is definitely worth following because it has photos like this one.

3. Robert Downey Jr.

He is Ironman. I mean, he just is. He's one of my favorite people in the universe and somehow he gets better looking the older he gets.

I would like to drink this coffee.

I adore him, have for a good long time now, and my adoration of him seems to grow a little bit more with each passing year. In the latest version of Ironman, he doesn't just kick a lot of ass, he also deals with the fact that Tony Stark has anxiety..which just proves that I could actually be a superhero after all.

He's been to hell and back a few times in real life and somehow came out of it all this significantly improved version of himself. He's irreverent. He's talented. He's hilarious. And he really doesn't care what anyone thinks of him.

4. Benedict Cumberbatch

I also arrived late the the Sherlock party, but I got there. He really does play a convincing quirky genius well. And a wicked Khan, for that matter. Seriously..who else geeked out a little when they saw that?

Anyway, he's not exactly the conventional leading man, but he does it for the nerdiverse. Let me tell you.

Just watch this.

I could listen to him read ingredient labels on the back of a cereal box all day. This is better though. Baby.

This prompted me to dress up my elf, Gollum and take this picture.

I have issues. I know. You don't have to tell me.

For a while, I couldn't really see what his appeal was, and I wondered what it was that all these women were talking about. Then I watched this scene. Over and over and over.

5. Christian Slater.

Because he was the first on the list and he'll probably forever remain on the list no matter who else comes around because...well...because this.

And this.

Do you ever get the feeling that everything in America is completely fucked up? Yes, Happy Harry Hard-On. Yes I do.

Oh.My.Gawd. He's still speaking to me after all these years. Plus, the soundtrack from this movie is freaking amazing.

Honorable Mentions

Oh, Adam. You shouldn't have.

Anthony Mackie as Falcon. Swoon.

Jon Snow, you know nothing.

Byung Hun Lee. You are welcome.

Paul Rudd. Don't act like you know me.
No dance-y remixes allowed.

Mr. Cooper. Yes, we are that formal.

Because he can be anyone.

Bring it on down to JT-ville.


  1. Add Gerard Butler and it would be PERFECT! I almost typed pervy.

  2. I like Robert Downey Jr. too. But Deppy is numero uno in my book. Hoooowaaaahhhh! :)


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