Part of what I remember about the wonder that is this challenge from the last time I did it is this: coming up with the positive answers is often harder than coming up with the negative ones.
Why is that?
Why are we better at being critical about ourselves than we are at celebrating what we do well?
Why can we see the bad so clearly, but have to search for the good?
No answers here, just observations.
Day 2 ~ Something You Love About Yourself
(stares at blank screen for a while)
Told you that this one is hard. The first time I did it, I went totally shallow and picked my eyes. It was a cop-out and I knew it, but one that is still true because I do love my eyes.
I want this round of truth to be a little more real though, so I'm going to have to find something else.
Here it is.
I am strong; maybe not physically as much as I could or should be or have been in the past. I am strong mentally, emotionally. I've had a life so insane these past few years that there really is truth when I tell you that I have no need to write fiction - my life is stranger.
I've seen things. Horrible, awful things. I've been hurt in ways that I never could have imagined by friends, by family, by strangers. I've been taken advantage of, I've been taken for granted, I've been manipulated and deceived. Events have transpired that I couldn't have imagined on my wildest days.
And yet, here I am. There were times that I thought for sure that it all would break me, times that it almost did. I refused to allow that to happen. I had to fight. I had to do more, be more, give more. I had to try hard, then try harder when my first try failed. I had to make some awful choices that no one should ever have to make. I have since had to deal with the consequences of those choices, the primary one being that very few people can understand me. They judge me.
So be it.
I know that I did what I had to do. I know that I've done what I've done for the right reasons. I know that I could have thrown my hands up and walked away.
I am here. I am wiser and more aware now, even if I picked up a few scars along the way.
I am a survivor.
I am strong.
And that's pretty awesome.
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