Saturday, April 2, 2011

Smell The Roses

It's 3pm and I just turned on the computer for the first time today.

Which feels pretty damn good, I have to tell you. 

For as much as I love this blogging journey I embarked on, there are times that I need to step away from it too.  And after yesterday, frankly I am a little surprised I'm writing anything at all today.

Yesterday was tough.

One of the hardest days I've had since my Dad died.

Knowing that my words touched so many people helps somehow. 

If even one person changes how they operate because of it, then my goal has been met and more.

If one person quits smoking.

If one person stops and thinks and never starts.

If one person forgives someone they love for ever doing it in the first place.

If one person stops blaming the victim and embraces the person instead.

Truth is, I never blamed my father for smoking.  I didn't.  He was young and impulsive when he started.  Everyone did it back then, unaware of the risks.  By the time they knew any better, they were all hooked on a drug more addictive than heroin. 

Right now I don't want to get caught up in being angry at anyone or anything, though the anger is there below the surface for sure.  Anger at cancer.  Anger at the lack of research in the area, as patients are blamed for their illness and considered lost causes even by many within the medical establishment.  Anger at the tobacco companies.  Anger at the suppression of the facts for so many years.  Anger at the government refusing to really do anything about it because they enjoy the tax revenue generated by the addiction. 

I am angry at a lot of things.  But not him.  I never was.

And that matters. 

A lot. 

This whole blogging experience, much like my father's journey with cancer has simultaneously pushed me to document life better and live it more fully.

I stop more now.  I slow down.  I hold a child just because they will sit in my lap for a moment.

I breathe, really breathe.

I try to take in my experiences completely.  I've learned that the only way to do that is to walk away from all the distractions. 

And live.

When life gives me pause, only then can I write. 
The view on my walk yesterday

Life is too short to be angry.  Besides, being angry takes too much energy away from the things far more deserving of it.

Drink the wine.  Go for the walk.  Hug the friend.  Forgive others.  Do what you love.  Smell the roses.


No comments:

Post a Comment

Some of My Most Popular Posts