Tuesday, March 1, 2011

This is what happens when you don't use protection

How the hell did it get to be March already?

You'll have to forgive me today, I am cranky.  My back hurts.  That ass kicking I did today....well, in the process I kicked my own ass.

I know already that if it hurts now, it's going to get worse before it gets better.

Which is awesome.

Almost as awesome as my kitchen floor.

Funny story about that.

So, we've been in this house over five years, put over five years of wear and tear into that scratched and dented and faded wood floor.  The kids have spilled more various liquids on it than I could name here.   There are at least four spots of plum nail polish on it.  A dent where the huge flashlight was dropped on it.  It needs to be stripped and sanded and refinished anyway, right?  Right????

As it turns out, stripping and sanding and all that might not be enough anymore.

My husband insisted all those years ago that we needed to put the kegerator in my formal dining room.  In the one room in the house that was pretty and relatively untouched by kids.  Italian countryside themed, mustard yellow walls, beautiful chandelier.  And a kegerator. 

Nothing says formal dining like a keg, right?

But I digress.

This story isn't about how he invaded my pretty room with his man beer machine.  It's about the kitchen floor, on the opposite side of the wall from the dining room. 

Whole room away.

Or not.

So the last time he got a keg, he apparently forgot to put a washer back on the connector. 

Just one tiny little piece of rubber, right?  Wrong.

The keg started leaking.  A little at a time, not enough that anyone noticed. 

For days.

Beer ran under the tile in the dining room, under the drywall into the sub floor and up through the hardwood floor in the kitchen.  The wood is now warped and bumpy.  As it dries out, it gets worse. 

And I'm not sure it can be fixed.   

Which is also awesome.

It's a good thing it was a slow leak and the keg is still mostly full.  I'm drinking tonight.

Let this be a lesson to you.

Women, don't let men invade your pretty spaces with their man things.

Men, put on the rubber.  Seriously.

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